What to do with friends who ignore you, in 5 steps?

What to do with friends who ignore you, in 5 steps?

There are times when a relationship seems to end and you don’t talk to someone anymore. To do?

Friendship, many times, has fuzzy limits. Some friends need to see each other almost every day to feel good, and others may go on seeing each other once a year.

Precisely for this reason, sometimes there are situations of ambiguity or in which a slight conflict becomes entrenched and results in the refusal to speak to solve it. This is what happens when one friend ignores another, or when both ignore each other. Faced with this type of experience, it is difficult to know what to do and how to redirect the situation, or even to know if it is worth investing efforts to redirect it.

 with friends who ignore you, in 5 steps?

What to do when a friend ignores me?

When solitary confinement situations appear this type appears, do not stand idly by; the more time that passes, the more the problem can get worse, and although it is true that it can be solved by factors external to us, it is better not to tempt luck.

So, follow these tips and adapt them to your case to maximize the chances of clarifying the matter and bringing about reconciliation.

1. Objectively analyze the situation

First of all, stop and think if you really have reason to worry. Sometimes, the fear of loneliness or rejection can cause us to see mirages, false situations of “danger” and isolation. For example, try to estimate in weekly hours or daily minutes how often you interact with that person, and if it is much less than it used to be months ago.

2. Take an interest in the possible causes

The uncertainty and discomfort that arise when a friend ignores us can make us feel quite bad. On the one hand, there is the question of whether this abrupt stop in the communication flow between two people is due to something that has happened (for example, the other has been offended by something) or to something that has stopped happening (for example, the completion of classes, the university being the only space that was shared). It can also be a combination of the above, of course.

Therefore, to solve this problem, the first thing is to investigate the possible causes that have triggered it, even if at first we have little information. To do this, you have to do a small initial investigation, which will consist of rejecting or confirming any suspicions that we have about what is happening and then asking the other person directly about what is happening to them, choosing a suitable time and place. and that allows you to speak frankly and privately.

3. Analyze what happens

In this phase, we must reflect on what is known about the case and see if we have had any responsibility for it. Have we done anything that gives reason to discontinue the deal? Does the other person feel bad about something bad we have done? We must not forget that in case this is due to a bad action on our part, these withdrawals of speech are something that helps us to reflect on the implications of what we do, its effects on other people.

However, be careful not to blame yourself. Ultimately, it is not always our responsibility that others feel bad about something we do.

4. Decide if friendship makes sense

When a friend stops talking to us, it gives us information about what they expect from that bond and why they are related to us. So, you have to stop to see with perspective if you really have reasons to stop talking to us or not, bearing in mind that by doing so you risk losing that friendship.

If you consider that this is a very extreme measure and that there are no valid reasons to do so, it is perfectly legitimate for you to rethink whether it is worth continuing to worry about that person for whom it seems that you exist rather little.

In case you conclude that no, or even that it is simply a strategy to make you feel guilty and that you follow behind, generating a bond of dependency, you may have to go through a phase of sadness and mourning, but in order to accounts, you will surely get over it.

5. Stop to talk

If until now your role was that of a person who collects information, now is the time to create, to propose. Meet your friend and let them express themselves. Then express yourself. Negotiating a solution is important so that both of you feel comfortable in that friendly relationship.

If the other person does not even want to do that, ask yourself to what extent you want to continue insisting to fix things and, once this is done, inform the other person off when it will be the moment when you will stop trying to talk about it and assume that the friendship is definitely over. Although it is hard, it is necessary to be clear when a bond has been cut so as not to think about it obsessively, entailing hopes that only lead to frustration.

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What to do with friends who ignore you, in 5 steps?